Military Families Gear up for Goodbyes
By Amanda Salem
According to the Huffington Post, President Barack Obama may be softening the blow of his plan for a 30,000-troop surge to Afghanistan by setting an exit strategy for July 2011. However, if you ask one of the many Marines gathered at Camp Lejeune in North Carolina Monday — exit strategy or not — it’s the support of family that gets them through their deployment overseas.
President Obama announced the surge last week, which has left many military families gearing up, not only for war, but for goodbyes. Adm. Mike Mullen, Joint Chiefs of Staff, told the group at Camp Lejeune, “You don’t do it alone … You do it with phenomenal family support.”
One relief for military families may be the news that, according to Army leaders, the troop surge will not affect deployment length. In other words, troops won’t likely see 15-month deployments. However, that relief is just a small step.
“I don’t think when you have X number of deployments under your belt that it makes it any easier – you just know what to expect,” Marine Capt. Eric Meador told reporters Monday.
Brig. Gen. Jeff Mathis, who is an acting commander of Fort Lew is in Washington State, meets with families regularly and told CNN consultants are trying to relieve stress in any way they can. Brig. Gen. Mathis also says he’d like to see a longer stretch at home for troops between deployments.
Although military families know their loved ones will always answer the call, they also know they have support in each other. Through advice, a listening ear or just someone to worry with, families and army officials are hoping to support the very thing that keeps the troops going while they are thousands of miles from home. Because every moment a birthday is missed, an anniversary is celebrated through an e-mail, or a “good night” is whispered into thin air, each family knows a hero simply wishes to be welcomed home with a hug.
CNN and The Huffington Post contributed to this report.
Marrying a ‘Baller’ far from the Blissful Life?
Many may think marrying a professional athlete would be a whirlwind of “Happily ever after” upon uttering the words “I do.” However, according to a number of athlete’s wives, it is quite far from the truth. The recent news of Tiger Woods’s car accident and alleged affair with a 24-year-old cocktail waitress has brought the subject into the spotlight.
On Wednesday Woods posted an apology on his Web site, referring to his “transgressions.” He states, “I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves.” On the same day US Weekly magazine published a voicemail message, which they claim is from Woods to the 24-year-old waitress, imploring her to take her name off her phone because his wife, Elin Nordegren, may go through his phone.
Erin Crispin, wife of a former Phoenix Suns and Los Angeles Lakers basketball player, told CNN Wednesday that she has great sympathy for Woods’s wife. Crispin told reporters that being the wife of a pro athlete means one gets special treatment both when things are going well and when things simply aren’t.
Due to her own experiences, Crispin started a Web site called “Married to a Baller” to help other wives of pro athletes. She says that although their husbands can provide a privileged lifestyle, their lives are still real and their families face very real problems. Crispin notes that much of her relief in life has come from her faith. However, she says the blog-format Web site offers a way for her to relieve stress and hopefully help others to do the same.
Washington Wizards Forward Caron Butler’s wife, Andrea Butler, told CNN, “People believe that money makes life easy, and that’s not always so.” Between money and the media, many in Butler’s, Crispin’s and Nordegren’s shoes may have learned to be very tight-lipped when it comes to their own families and feelings. However, no matter how big the balance may be in the bank account, everyone could use someone to listen without passing judgment … and sometimes can be found at your fingertips and your very own URL.
CNN contributed to this report.
by Amanda Salem
4 Steps to Becoming a Better Partner
Sharing your life with someone is wonderful, but it’s not always easy. It takes time, patience, and a lot of work.
Even when you’re in a relationship you can really only control your own actions, so if you want to improve your life with the one you love, it’s best to begin from within. Use these four steps to help you become the best you and the best partner.
1) Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
No matter how great your partner is, after a while their habits start to get on your nerves. Couples who live together find this especially difficult and routinely engage in arguments about domestic issues: laundry, cooking, etc. Well, what we’re here to tell you is, don’t sweat the small stuff. Read more
Secrets from Soulmates #3
Arielle Ford, author of The Soulmate Secret: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction and her husband Brian Hilliard, a business consultant, answer your questions about life, love and relationships. They believe that whether you are eighteen or eighty years old finding Big Love is always possible. Email your questions to: soulmatesecret@yahoo.com
Dear Arielle and Brian:
I have been divorced for nearly ten years from someone I really loved but constantly cheated on me. I have been on a spiritual path for many years now, I have done affirmations and made vision boards but in spite of my best efforts to “get out there” and meet someone new nothing ever seems to happen. What do you suggest? Read more
The Invitation
It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living, I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.
It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring with your moon. Read more
Intimacy and Communication
Intimacy is the art of keeping one’s heart authentically open. Intimacy within relationships allows us to deepen the intimacy within our Self. Intimacy within our Self creates positive, soulful, and inventive relationships with the world.
Our deepest learning, frightening realizations and authentic measurement of our evolution lives inside of romantic relationships. Read more
Only a Person Who Risks is Free
Only a person who risks is free.
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self. Read more
Secrets from Soulmates #2
Arielle Ford, author of The Soulmate Secret: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction and her husband Brian Hilliard, a business consultant, answer your questions about life, love and relationships. They believe that whether you are eighteen or eighty years old finding Big Love is always possible. Email your questions to: soulmatesecret@yahoo.com
Dear Arielle and Brian: I have been in a relationship for nearly five years. I feel very safe, comfortable and care deeply for this person. He loves me unconditionally and he is there for me more than anyone I have ever been with. The problem is that I don’t feel like he is my “soul mate”. How do I know if he is the ONE? Read more
Sex and the Dual Income Couple
written by kyle roderick
Does the daily work grind for two-income couples (also known as Dincs) negatively impact the frequency or quality of their sex life? In other words, does sex stink for dincs?
Janet Hyde, a University of Wisconsin Madison psychology professor, surveyed more than 500 couples for her study, which was reported in the Journal of Family Psychology. Read more
Lighting Up the Dark Times
written by kyle roderick
mind/body strategies for beating depression
Despite a continually expanding body of research into depression and its potential treatments, many couples experience unnecessary suffering while trying to maintain relationships amidst depression. Marriages in which one partner has untreated depression are nine times more likely than others to end in divorce. The number one reason couples seek couples therapy is because of a sexual problem. In half of these cases, the problem can be traced to depression in one of them. It doesn’t have to be this way.While bliss is our birthright, it’s also true that most of us, and hence our relationships, crawl through sadness and often depression at least once in a lifetime. Read more
